Adventures at 1:30 in the Morning

The time is 1:22 and Frog Face had been fussing for a bit.  I had just finished feeding him so decided that I might try changing his diaper and re-swaddling him to see if it would help him settle.  Frog Face is old enough now that he usually does not poop during the night anymore so I laid him on the bed and proceeded with the diaper change.

Big. Mistake.

As soon as the diaper was removed, poop was squirting everywhere:  all over his clothing, his blanket, and of course all over my bed.  I quickly scoop up my little poop machine and move him to his changing table.  Frog Face currently sleeps in our room in a pack-n-play that has a bassinet and changing table attachment.  Now for those of you who have never changed a breast-fed baby's diaper, there is something you should know.  It is normally very liquidy and usually a yellow color.  Therefore, when a breast-fed baby has a bowel movement, it sounds EXACTLY like mustard squirting out of a squirt bottle.  And it distributes the same as well.  I like to compare it to when the mustard bottle is just about out and you are trying to get the last little bit and it splatters everywhere when you squeeze it.  Yeah, it's like that.

At this point I shove the clean diaper under his bum in the hopes that it will catch a bit of the splatter.  Nope!  It gets all over the diaper.  Being the resourceful person that I am, I use receiving blankets to cover the changing tables because it is easy to toss them in the wash if there is a mess.  So I use the receiving blanket to try and mop up the mess only to discover my little man is not done.  At this point we are both pretty much covered in yellow mustard.  I reach for another receiving blanket (good thing I have extra nearby!) and tuck it under his bum as well.

This works for a  split second before I realize that I should have been paying attention the the pee stream that is arcing toward our window and blinds and sadly strikes the poor little guy right in the face.

I manage to get the diaper on.  I toss the load of mustard clothing and blankets in the laundry, and wipe up the baby (and myself) as best I can with diaper wipes.  (By the way, diaper wipes are AMAZING and can be used for anything from taking off makeup to washing dirty hands and feet).  I make a mental note to give Frog Face a bath first thing in the morning, then redress and re-swaddle the child.

As I am settling back down (after finding a new blanket for myself) and getting ready to feed my little poop monster to try and lull him back to sleep, I look down at him and he gives me a big, gummy, froggy smile that melts my heart.  I don't blame him: I would smile too after all that!

And where is the Weatherman during this entire adventure?  Sound asleep.  Of course.

Lucky.

How he got the nickname "Frog Face"