Tails of a Working Mom: Conflicts

So as I am thinking of going to work tomorrow for the first time in over two months, a lot of conflicts keep running through my head. (along with other thoughts such as "Goober better get to sleep and stop singing to herself because she is going to be really tired in the morning")

First, I am excited to be returning to a job I love and doing something other than changing diapers and sitting on the couch. I am looking forward to getting back into our rhythm and routine and start our new normal, as crazy as that normal is going to be. I miss working with the animals a lot too. On the other hand, I really didn't mind sitting on the couch and changing diapers. I loved (almost) every moment of snuggling that little Frog Faced guy, watching him sleep, smile, and just look at me. It will be hard to leave him tomorrow, even though we did "practice" daycare last week to get us both used to it.

Second, I cannot believe that my little Frog Face is over 2 months old already! He smiles, tries so very hard to laugh, holds his head up pretty well, and has such a special personality already. I also can't believe that my Goober is going to be 3 years old next month! Part of me is excited for him and his sister to get older so I can see the people that they will become. But part of me is also screaming "Hold on! Who said you could be so big already". (this is also the same voice that often screams "What in the world are you doing being a parent? Who said you were responsible enough for that?!") Those first couple days after giving birth are exhausting and uncomfortable and at the time I remember just trying to survive from day to day. But now looking back at it I really miss those newborn days and wonder where they went.

Along this line of thought, I miss being pregnant. But at the same time it is nice to have my body to myself again (for the most part anyways, there are still some things that are dedicated to the little Frog Face). Despite this last pregnancy being a bit rough on me, I am one of those weirdos who enjoys most aspects of pregnancy. I don't even mind labor that much. I know, I said I was weird didn't I?

Fourth, I am really looking forward to fall and all that the season brings. Halloween, Thanksgiving, and (my favorite) Christmas are just around the corner. There are several special events at the zoo coming up that are always a lot of fun, including our fund raiser A Wild Affair and our Halloween event Boo! at the Zoo! Also, cool days, leaves changing colors, pumpkins, snuggling under blankets, and football (even though I don't really like football and we don't have cable so the Weatherman can't watch football, having the sport on in the background always adds to the fall feel). But I also HATE driving in the snow and getting all bundled up to go outside. I also don't like the cold much anyways and often get cabin fever during winter time because I don't like going outside as often.

Fifth, we had family visiting for the weekend and while I am glad to get back in our routine, I also was sad to see them go. It was so fun having them around to liven things up a bit and to take the kids so I could actually shower during the day and also pee in peace. Our cat, Little Pete (who is actually a girl cat, despite the masculine name), is glad they are gone though because she always hides the entire time we have any guests.

So as you can see, I have a lot of things running through my head! I have often been told that I think too much, and those people who have told me that are probably right. Probably.